yea, this explains everything.

Over..

you? Definitely not. I'm not. I can say it proudly cos I really am not.

We shouldn't have contacted after everything that'd happen. I shouldn't replied.

I don't talk about you anymore. Even though if people asks.

All i would say to them is "can we talk about it privately?"

and then they would forget it because i kept postponing the answer.

 truth is, I don't have the freaking guts anymore.

I'm the loser here. No kidding.

Because I'm left behind with all these questions. And so forth.

I don't know how to talk about these feelings. 

I'm not sure if I even want them to be heard.

Maybe I do, maybe I don't.

2012.

I miss when life didn't had to be this complicated, when you start to worry about appearance, money, results and whatever. Urgh. I don't know. Maybe I'm emo. Or maybe I'm just a negative person. I don't see things like some people do. Up-til now, I still can't figure out who/what are my priorities. I'm a mess, honestly. If you ever see me, you might think I'm doing fine. I am, well breathing at least! I promised myself, form4 would be different. And yes, I'm trying to make it different, literally. Trying, key word. Haha. I have no idea why, but my form teacher kinda bullies me. Lols. She makes me pissed! Anyways, a best friend of mine made me smiled in class that day. Like really she did something and made me smiled! Unlike we're talking and then we laughed cos of something. No, she really made me smiled. :) She suddenly wrote those words on my physics notebook.
I smiled. Thanks!