Arghhhhhhhhh.

Holidays. School holidays. Hmmm.


#1      Work. taught me lessons, life lessons. I wasn't sure that I even wanted to know what the real world is like out there. There's nice people who would help you just because they want something out of it. There's people who would bring you down with just a few words because of some misunderstanding. There's people who don't have respect at all for other people. There's people who treat you like a maid just because you're working. Sucks right? Yeah. Mummy said that's life. Two tiny words came out of mummy's mouth. Two little simple words but yet so complicated. Worked my ass off for a month then finally. FINALLY. got my salary. Gave mummy, daddy and sis parts of my salary. Ended up with. $0. Money ain't easy to earn. Don't spend it like you own the world! I mean it kids. Haha I'm still a kid too.


#2     Nerves. are kicking in. Woooo. Pmr results on CHRISTMAS DAY. Hah. How am people gonna rejoice when their nerves are kicking in, thinking about their results. Hey government, Christmas aint about you or whatever. Not you, not politics, no shits. It's about Jesus! Come on la. Okay back to the point, I hope my results are "look-able" *fingers crossed.


#3    Pressure. A standing ovation for those seniors who've done it before me. I salute you all! I really do. Being the dance choreographer for orientation may seem as a simple task. But when you sitting infront of a lappy thinking what to do. And the inspiration does not come. It ain't easy at all. Really. :(:(:(:( Okay, my original song was O.K - B1A4 and now it changed to DREAM HIGH. My vision of the dance was always, from the beginning, was to use a korean song. Years years of orientation, why can't things be different for a change? I felt like crap because of the people. Yes the people. At the end, people will asking who choreograph this dance? Who chose this song? All fingers will be pointed in my direction, not you guys. At the end, I will be the one taking the fall. Get it? You know how it feels when people say why is the song like that? Why this and why that? It wasn't even my decision. And now I'm taking the blame, as usual. Figures.


#4    You. God knows you'll never look here. So what the hell. You make me fucking pissed at you everytime I see your name on facebook. I don't know why. Things have changed, without a doubt. But you haven't. I know you. I saw the way you stare at me. I regreted being so close to you for that time. I got attached. But that was my wrong-doing. I'm like glad that I don't have to face you anymore since you're form5 and next year will be a totally new start for me. I hope it would be. But then again, I don't know whether to let go or keep going. I'm being pulled back and forth here. I'm torned. After all this time, I never let it out. I didn't cry. I didn't talk to people about it. Writing always seemed to be a better way to help me let out my feelings but somehow, it doesn't anymore. I have no idea when, I stopped writing my diary. I somehow hope I could loose all my memory and start over again. That way, I can at least be me.